Healing Chances
by FanfictionLuvr0914
Summary: She didn't live; she merely existed in a world that was drowning her. She couldn't remember much after that day in the woods where Edward left her. She could only remember the cruel words that he said. Words repeated by Jacob. She believes them. Can those who stand beside her convince her of her worth? Can they help her to heal before its too late? Bad at summaries please read.


**A/N: I am fairly new to writing fanfiction, so please if you review, no flames. I appreciate constructive criticism though, and there are ways to give it without being mean. This story is an idea that's been stuck in my head for a while, and I'm sorry if it doesn't make much sense or if it's badly written. I tried. Hope you like it!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own the characters. I can only wish.**

I stood on the balcony of my apartment in Seattle and looked across the city lights. I was finally over the Cullens abandoning me. Granted, it wasn't easy. Not only had a lost a boyfriend, but I had also lost a family. A mother figure that acted as a mother instead of as a friend to me. I had siblings that I had always secretly wanted. I planned to spend forever with this family. But those plans were shattered just days after I turned 18.

It's been a few years since the day Edward left, taking his family with him. What happened after he left is a hazy memory. All I could remember was the words that he said. At first I couldn't function. I was catatonic for a week and then after that I functioned just enough to survive.

I went through the motions that I was supposed to. I went to school, attended classes, and did my homework. I cooked dinner when it was time to eat, and I forced what I could down, even though I had no appetite. I cleaned the house, though I couldn't tell you what I did when. At lunchtimes in the school cafeteria, I sat at the table that Edward shared with me. I just sat there staring into space. I didn't eat, opting to listen to my iPod instead.

Then the day came when I found those motorcycles that were going to be trashed and I took them to Jake. _My_ Jacob. My own personal sun. At least he was. He fixed the bikes up and taught me how to ride them behind Charlie's back. After many trips to the ER where I lied about how I got injured, I eventually got the hang of it.

The more time I spent with Jake, the more I felt like my old self. I started to feel like _me_ again. And as I started actually living again as opposed to just existing, I started to become angry at the way Edward left. I was angry at the Cullens as a whole for abandoning me. I was finally seeing them in a not so pretty light.

Jake finally made his move dropping me off at home after a night at the movie theaters with my friends. He made promises that I thought he would keep. With Jake, I was safe. While I wasn't whole, I was better. I rejected him; I just wasn't ready for a relationship yet, with anyone. I thought he understood when he dropped me off. I was wrong.

For weeks after that night Jake started ignoring all of my calls and I was banned from visiting. The day I went up there anyway because I needed my best friend, my world was shattered again. He sent me away, told me he didn't want to be my friend anymore. That I was too much trouble for him. And then he walked away, no matter how much I begged him to stay, to give me another chance. He never responded, just kept walking. The pieces that he had fought to put together were torn apart again.

That night my nightmares were worse than normal. And each time I woke up, I curled into a little ball and cried myself back to sleep. Edward was right. Jake was right. I wasn't worth the trouble. I wasn't worth it. I truly believed that at the time.

I became even more withdrawn in school. Most people gave up on me by then. I was generally left alone. The only ones who continued to try to break through to me were Mike and Angela. Somehow they saw something in me and kept trying, no matter how many times I rebuffed them and pushed them away.

Eventually they got through to me. They broke through the outer wall when they consistently stood up for me against their other friends, sometimes to the point of losing those friendships. Angela and Eric broke up because of this. I didn't know why either of them were willing to sacrifice so much for me.

Angela accepted that I wasn't willing to talk about what happened. She didn't push. Instead she just talked about anything and everything she could think of. I knew what she was doing; I knew that she was trying to take my mind of things for a while. It worked. Her random, out of character chatter made me think about other things, brought me out of my numb stupor for an hour or two at a time.

Mike never asked me out on a date. After the movie night, he backed off, and even went so far as to apologizing for being so inconsiderately persistent. He helped me ward off the other guys who just didn't get the message that I wasn't interested.

Little by little both of my friends broke through my outer wall and started piecing whatever parts of me they could back together. Slowly the numb haze that I stayed wrapped him began to fade, and I started feeling again. Just like it did with Jake. But this time, I felt the loss of both the Cullens and of Jake.

The first time I broke down crying was right after my shift at work. I was in the break room and I heard Mrs. Newton talking about how it was a shame the Cullens were gone, as they had been good customers. And memories came flooding back, whether I wanted them to, or not. The Cullen's supposed camping trips when it was sunny out. Mike found me not long after, and held me in his lap as I sobbed into his chest for hours. He held me like he was trying to hold me together so that I didn't fall to pieces again. Afterwards, I gave him a grateful smile and neither of us mentioned it again.

The second time Angela found me in the girl's restroom at school, where I was stuffed into a corner under the sinks, my arms wrapped tightly around my middle. This time it was Lauren and Jessica telling me what I already knew; I didn't mean anything to the Cullens, I was just a toy to them. I knew that. But it still stung to hear it from someone else. She coaxed me out of my spot and got me to my truck where Mike was already waiting. She must have texted him.

After that day it was silently decided between the three of us that whenever I broke down again Mike would be the one to hold me through it. And I did break down again. Frequently. It seemed that once the dam was broken, it would stay broken.

After a few months I stopped crying so easily and I started _healing_. I became more invested in activities. I learned to smile, to laugh, to have fun and live again. I learned how to be the pre-Cullen Bella again. Graduation came and went. Angela moved to Seattle for college, and we would video chat every couple weeks and visit every month. Mike decided to stick around Forks for another year, claiming that he hadn't decided on school yet. I suspected he was also worried about leaving me alone.

It was about a year after Edward left when I was finally ready to talk. I talked to Mike first, having somehow grown closer to him through my crying spells.

I told him about how the Cullens all left without saying goodbye, except for Edward. That was the first time I could say his name without falling apart. I cried as I relived the words that both Edward and Jacob had said to me. I wasn't worth it. I wasn't wanted. And after I finished, I waited for Mike to see that I truly was not worth it. I waited for him to send me away in disgust.

I remember his reaction that day as clearly as if it only happened yesterday. I half expected him to run screaming. But instead he looked me in the eye, saying all the right things that I needed to hear. That conversation was a turning point for me,

" _Bella, if they really think that of you, then they need to get their sanity checked. What they did to you, what they said, it was wrong. You are beautiful, kind, and completely selfless. I am attracted to you physically, that's no secret, but your soul is absolutely breathtakingly good and beautiful, I plan to prove to you that you are worth it. You are worthy of being loved, Arizona."_

" _But why? Why go through all the trouble for me?"_

 _He smiled, "Simple. Isabella Marie Swan, I am in love with you. I will fight to win your heart, your trust. I will wait for you to give me a chance to make you happy, and if you decide you want someone else, then I will gladly still be your friend."_

True to his word, Mike waited. He never pushed for more than I was ready for, and kept things strictly platonic. He spent day after day telling me and doing little things to show me that I was worth it. And after a number of weeks, I began to believe him. Why else would he still want to be around me?

It was just after Christmas before I realized that I hadn't cried over Edward in a long time, and hearing his name no longer hurt. I realized that I really was able to move on if I wanted to. On Christmas Eve Angela came over to exchange gifts and talk.

I remembered when I told her about what Edward and Jacob had said, and what Mike had been doing,

" _It's because of you and Mike that I was able to heal again. You guys were there for me unconditionally. Edward and Jacob really made me feel like I wasn't worth it. Like I wasn't worthy of love. Like I was nothing. And after I finally told Mike about it, he has spent every day doing little things to show me that I am worth it. He tells me every day that I am worth it, that I am beautiful."_

" _And do you believe him?"_

" _I'm starting to. He told me he was in love with me, but he wouldn't push for more than friendship. He said he would wait for me until I was ready to move on."_

 _Angela smiled at me, "And are you ready? Are you having feelings for Mike?"_

" _I'm starting to, but I'm scared that he'll hurt me too eventually. If I let myself love him, what if he finds someone better?"_

 _She sighed, "Bella you can't know what will happen in the future, but I think that Mike won't ever hurt you intentionally. He loves you too much for that. I know he does. But you'll never know if you don't take the chance. Do you want to spend your life wondering what if you did?"_

I had spent that night and Christmas day considering her words. She was right, if I thought about it. I'd never know if I didn't try. I didn't know how I was going to tell him that I wanted to give him a chance. I didn't want him to think that I was just humoring him.

Eventually I settled on just letting things flow naturally. And they did. The first time we kissed, we were walking on the beach. I had fallen and took him down with me. He had landed on top of me and our faces were barely an inch apart. He gave me time to stop him before our lips met.

After that day, it was silently agreed that kissing was allowed, and oftentimes he would kiss me at random and each time I would deepen the kiss as far and I was ready to. As time passed, the kisses slowly progressed into more, and things came to a head and I had to make a choice. I chose to let him love me, and to give myself to him, both my virginity and my heart. I chose to take the chance.

And today, standing here on this balcony, and waiting for Mike to come home for work, I continued to let the memories of the last few years come to me. I knew what I didn't then. I am worth it. Mike really is in love with me. He had proven that.

I sighed as I felt a strong pair of arms wrap around my waist and felt his hot breath on my neck as he mumbled, "I missed you today."

I leaned back into him, "I missed you too… I've been visiting memories of the last few years."

He pulled back and turned me around to look at him, "Oh really? Do you still wish Edward and Jacob were still around?" he asked looking worried.

"No, Mike. I love you. I want you. I was remembering how you and Angela helped me to heal. Thank you for that, by the way. I don't know what I would've done without you."

"…Oh…so if either of them came back for you…"

I cut him off with a kiss, "I'd tell them where to shove it. I know that it took me a long time to get to this point with you, but I love you, Mike. I want you, and no one else. Ok?"

He nodded before I continued talking nervously, "Well, now that that's settled, I have something to tell you." He looked at me in panic before I soothed him, "Relax. It's nothing bad, not really. Mike…how would you like to be a father?"

He stared at me blankly for a few seconds before it dawned on him, "You're pregnant?"

"Apparently. Is that bad? I mean, I know we wanted to wait, and I just found out at the doctor's today but…"

This time he cut me off with a kiss. "It's not bad. It's fucking great Arizona." He picked me up and carried me inside, and we made love for hours until we both slipped into a happy, peaceful sleep.

Seven months later we welcomed Skylar Newton into the world and into our hearts. Years passed and we were blessed with 3 more children before deciding it was enough.

As we grew older and the children grew out of the house and flew the nest our love for each other stayed constant. It seemed like another lifetime where I was left in pieces twice. Where Mike held me as I cried. Where he helped me to heal. I was healed, happy, and entirely whole.


End file.
